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By: Shaden, mother of one boy.
From the moment I found out I was pregnant, I knew I wanted to breastfeed my baby. I just knew it was the right thing for me to do.
Breastfeeding has countless advantages for the mother and baby, and as I progressed in my pregnancy, I did lots of research about anything and everything baby-related. I had no doubt I wanted to breastfeed for as long as I can. I also decided that I didn't want any kind of formula to be a part of our lives.
I'm not going to sit here and pretend like it was easy because it wasn't, especially in the first few months. And to be honest, most of the problems and stress that I had were because of the lack of experience and confidence as a first-time mother. Self-doubt can take its toll on you. You may keep thinking that you are not producing enough milk and your baby is never full. But actually, in most cases that is not true. It is just a burden that we put on our shoulders because we sometimes don't know any better.
But once you and your baby get the hang of it, it becomes the most amazing form of natural bonding that you wouldn’t trade for the world. It becomes more than enough for you to feel that you are giving your baby the most incredible gift to start a great life.
As for what they call "extended breastfeeding," or when you choose to continue to breastfeed past the age of one (which, to be honest, I don't see anything extended about it), I had a lot of struggles. My struggles were not about my baby or me, but with society! Starting with my own mother!
At first, my mother was a huge supporter of my breastfeeding, but once my son turned eight or nine months old she started telling me that it’s time to wean him. When he turned one, she made me feel like it was a crime to continue breastfeeding and that he was "old enough" to not have the breast anymore.
But that never stopped me, I knew it was the right thing and that neither of us was ready to stop. Even though at that age he was mostly on solids and he ate almost everything, but he also would nurse every two hours around the clock still! That was enough for me to know he was not ready.
As he got older, I would hear a lot of comments from random people and, unfortunately, even pediatricians that I took my son to, that he was old and it was weird that I was still breastfeeding him. I couldn't help but feel sorry for them for how ignorant they were!
I would hear a lot of comments from random people and, unfortunately, even pediatricians that I took my son to, that he was old and that it was weird that I was still breastfeeding. I couldn't help but feel sorry for them on how ignorant they were!
I wanted to breastfeed him for at least two years or until my son self weans himself. And in the end, it was a mix of both.
He gradually nursed less and less for the past year, until he was only nursing to sleep and a few times at night. Then he dropped his naps completely (poor me), so that left us with only a few nursing sessions which made it easy to let go of one by one. So one day, I felt like he would be fine with not nursing anymore, and I was right. My boy weaned with no drama at all, which is unusual in the weaning process, and especially for my son, who has a very stubborn personality.
So I feel like it was a blessing to be able to nurse for that long (almost 25 months), and it's also a blessing that it ended peacefully. And now, we can both enjoy pre-sleep cuddles without expecting to breastfeed.
My advice for mothers who want to breastfeed:
1- Do your homework: do lots of research about everything so you won't be surprised. Most of the problems you may encounter are normal and can be solved easily.
2- Never have formula as an option: don't buy it, don't keep the samples they, unfortunately, give at hospitals and don't let nurses at the hospital feed the baby formula. These things will only make breastfeeding more complicated and create more self-doubt.
3- Never listen to people: especially those that don't know what they are talking about. Always do your research and have confidence in the decisions that you make
4- Always listen to your instinct: Use your motherly "sixth sense” in everything baby-related. If everyone is telling you to let the baby cry it out, but your heart is telling you to pick him up, then listen to your heart. If everyone is telling you to nurse every four hours, but your baby is attached to you 24/7, then that's what he needs! Just listen to your baby's cues and your gut feeling.
I hope my experience helps other moms who are going through that as well. Breastfeeding all the way mommies!
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